Thursday, March 31, 2005

My Mom Works Too Much

This morning I was in the kitchen with mom and dad hoping for crumbs or at least a good belly rub, when dad mentions mommy's "work schedule". I know what that means. Now I will be missing mom the next 5 days for hours and hours each day. In doggie time, that adds up to...a good portion of my life. I wish she didn't have to leave and come home so late at night. She did say that she would take me to work with her tonight so I can have my stitches checked. Yay! I get to go for a ride! Spenser and Chance will be so envious.

Wednesday, March 30, 2005

The Big Box

The day after the horrible fight, my mom and Callie's mom watched what they called a dvd. It was all about a dog named Skip. He got to do all kinds of things that I am forbidden to do, such as drinking out of the toilet, going inside the grocery store to receive treats, and running loose outside. Throughout the whole thing they were either making giggling sounds or their eyes were running like faucets. Mom said she couldn't bear to see the end because it makes her eyes and nose leak really bad, so she left the room. I can't understand how they can look at life through a big box for so long. I'd rather be outside and watch the world go by that way.

On The Mend

Even though I am recovering from surgery, guard duty is still high on my list of priorities. From my towering position on the ottoman, I am able to control Spenser and Chance quite nicely. The second they go for one of my toys (or even theirs) I soar through the air like a bullet, growl fiercely and chase them away. They usually respond by tucking their tails and turning away from me. Mom says they look as though a bumble bee has just stung them. Sometimes, Spenser will rebel by barking loudly. If he does that, Mommy shouts my name and with head hung low (to show how obedient I am) I walk slowly over and snuggle close to her. If I manage to look particularly pitiful, she will say, "Good boy!" in that sweet, sappy voice. I thank her profusely by thumping my tail and licking her face.

***update - sympathy letter 4/27/05***

Dear Sparky,

As your Aunt, I wanted to extend my fondest wishes for a speedy recovery. I was horrified to hear the news of your tragic run-in with your sister. I was incapcitated for days from worry!

But I know you are a survivor (I can picture you running up the Philadelphia steps just like Sylvester Stallone did in Rocky) overcoming your unfortunate accident.

Here's a tip: If I were you, when Callie comes for another visit I would keep both eyes and one and half ears (sorry) open! Be aware, alert and on guard.

I'm sure Callie is sorry for the whole Mike Tyson/Evander Holyfield incident and would never do it again - but play it safe.

Well, again, hoping you make a full recovery. I saw your picture and I think it only adds to your already wonderful character.

Toodles,

Aunt Jo Anne

P.S. Dogs rule, cats drool!!!

Tuesday, March 29, 2005

Milking My Injury For All It's Worth

Since my mishap 3 days ago, Mom bought me two new toys, a thick new blankie and a big bag of Riblets! I just keep pouring it on with my huge soulful eyes and she falls for it every time. She's wrapped around my little dewclaw I tell ya. So is Dad. He's been talking so sweet to me, like I'm one of the little humans. My injury will work to my complete advantage if I play all my doggie bones right. I will outsmart my humans and live a life of sheer luxury. My injured ear will be a permanent reminder of the pain and misery I have suffered at the paws (and teeth) of another, which I will fully use to further my cause. Aahhh. I am truly Master of My Domain.

Monday, March 28, 2005

Easter Weekend and the Big Fight

Callie came to visit from Memphis. I overheard the humans say that she will be moving here permanently in May. This could pose a serious threat to my very existence, especially after what happened on Saturday.

You see, I took it upon myself to guard her large bag of puppy food. They tried to hide it from me in the upstairs bedroom, but my superior smelling abilities sniffed it out in no time. Mommy shooed me away from the bag Friday night and shut the door right in my face. The nerve! I sat by the door, awaiting my opportunity, as I know from experience that all doors are opened again eventually.

The next morning, Mommy was in the shower and Callie's mommy had left the bedroom for a split second when something terrible happened. I'm embarrassed to admit that I was overpowered by Callie and she ripped my ear in half. I ran and hid under Mommy's bed. As I was shaking my head, blood was splattering all over the room. I was completely traumatized. Callie's mom was crying.

Lucky for me my Mom works at a vet hospital and I go to work with her a lot, so everyone knows me and loves me. Before they operated, some of the nurses made bunny ears out of gauze and placed a colorful wrap around my head (see picture above). Glad someone was getting enjoyment out of my painful ordeal. Soon, a mask was put over my face and before I knew it, the room was getting hazy, and then I was dreaming of that big bag of puppy food....and it was all mine!

Dr. C. sewed my ear back together, but now it looks funny and it hurts. I will sport my war wound proudly though so other canines will see how tough I am and that I should not be messed with.

Thursday, March 24, 2005

Plea to Mommy

Lately, my Mommy has been gone a lot and I miss our cuddle time. I claw and beg and plead with my huge eyes, and she says she has to leave so she can bring home the bacon. BACON??!!! Where is it then? I never see her bring home any bacon! Something is fishy. She explained that she has to leave and come back in order to provide me with the luxurious lifestyle to which I've become accustomed. I'd rather have her home, planted on the couch, for my good pleasure (with the bacon).

Monday, March 7, 2005

Trip Notes

The trip to Memphis seemed like an eternity. It took at least one doggy year off my life.

Callie was overjoyed to see me, but I was dog-tired (excuse the expression) from the road trip. She kept pouncing on me. I couldn't let on that I was frightened to death, so I snarled and snipped and growled as mean as possible. Mommy explained that she just wanted to play. Her definition of play is a little different from mine to say the least.

When I got back home Spenser and Chance sniffed the life out of me. Their noses were asking where I was and who I was with. The questioning was relentless. Talk about the third degree! I had to nip at them and show my fierce pearly whites when they got too nosy. Finally, they obtained their information and left me alone. Geesh! My brothers act like bloodhounds from the KGB.